Matters of the Heart 101: Take Off Your Cape

This week we are focusing on the seeds of reflection and release. Reflection is the ability to look at your words, thoughts, actions, and behaviors honestly and openly. In times of prayerful reflection, we can have God show us our hearts in ways we may not be aware of. As a reflective person, I tend to dig deep into my thoughts and actions to become the best me I can be. Over the past 2 years, I realized the importance of reflection coupled with the idea of release.

Search me, O God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. Point out anything in me that offends you, and lead me along the path of everlasting life. Psalm 139: 23-24 (NLT)

In the beginning phases of the 2020 lockdown due to the pandemic, like many I spent a lot of time painting, doing puzzles, binge-watching tv shows, and even learning the latest Tik Tok dance challenges. As time moved on and we were still under quarantine orders, I began to spend more time praying and reflecting. It was amazing, it was as if I had an appointment with God and during those times He would show me areas of improvement. I made sure to keep a journal so that I could be aware of my areas of weakness and continue to become a better person. In the beginning, I was so happy to have a newfound awareness of myself and what I could do differently. It was as if I was receiving a cheat code to become the best version of myself. However, as time passed, I noticed that the more God showed me the more burdened I felt.

I had a journal full of things that I was supposed to fix but the more faults I saw the more overwhelmed I felt. Although I was reflecting on my quiet time with God, I was failing to release the pressure of performance. Every time I left the prayer room, I left in my own strength. I was determined to be kind, not gossip, always say my prayers, be hopeful & positive, show love to those that were difficult, be understanding, all on my own. I entered the prayer room aware of God's power that could be at work in me but left with a superwoman cape trying to be everything to myself and everyone without Him or His help.

For I can do everything through Christ, who gives me strength. Philippians 4:13 (NLT)

It wasn't that I couldn't become more Christ-like, the problem was that I was trying to become Christ-like without God's help. I was beginning to feel heavy, hopeless, and lost. I felt terrible because as much as I wanted to be better, I knew that I would never meet the mark on my own. I began to resent others for their ability to do the things that I was trying to do. My heart was becoming hard and it was all because of the stress and pressure of trying to "become" without God's help. Instead of going to the source, I relied on myself to be the source.

Similar to my situation, reflection without release is a form of stress. The everyday pressures of life can weigh us down if we do not acknowledge and release them to God. Whether it's stress from our job, family members & friends or stress from within, without an appropriate release we can internalize stress affecting our spiritual and physical heart. We often take in stress without learning or looking for healthy ways to cope with it. Stressors in life cannot be avoided 100% but what we do when we are stressed is key. Talking to a trusted friend or loved one, exercising, enjoying a hobby or journaling are a few ways to cope with and manage stress. If you can relate, at times we overlook the help that we have in friends, family, and most importantly God to help us in times of stress or pressure. We were not created to be the answer to all of our problems but to rely on God, the answer to our problems. Keep your heart free from stress and address your stressors in healthy ways and lay your burdens at the feet of the One who cares for you.

Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you.
1 Peter 5:7 (NLT)